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billbaily
Super Member

1054 Posts

Posted - 20/01/2021 :  14:40:15 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote


Just a little message.... for all those folk that are not feeling very grand
Don't be afraid to ask someone for help.... I'm sure they will gladly understand

Don't struggle...worry... and think you have to cope all on your own
Reach out.... even if it's for a friendly chat to someone at the end of your phone

Take care.......
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billbaily
Super Member

1054 Posts

Posted - 26/01/2021 :  12:09:51 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote

Trevor's Soup Disaster

A few months ago Doris bought a whizzer...it's what I call this particular machine
It pulverizes cooked vegetables at a speed... like you've never, ever seen

I'm not allowed in the kitchen....when the whizzer is doing it's thing
I had a go ONCE...didn't put it together properly... and boy did I hear a loud massive PING!

Holey moley the result was soup spots everywhere....on the ceiling and all on the floor
so you can see why Doris doesn't want me... anywhere near the kitchen anymore

It took us ages to wash down the walls...the mixture got in places we didn't know we even had
Honestly we were both shattered.... the mess it made was really, really bad

So now I just sit at the dining table... put the news on and wait there until Doris gives me a call
Then its time for a hot bowl of veggie soup.... accompanied with a delicious buttered crusty roll

LUVLY JUBBLY!
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billbaily
Super Member

1054 Posts

Posted - 26/01/2021 :  15:17:01 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote

WHAT WAS BAT?

Ooooooo something fell down our chimney.... approximately 10pm late last Sunday night
so we are going to remove the mantlepiece.....as soon as it gets day light

Doris is hoping it's nothing.... with wild & flapping wings
Namely a bat.... as she's terrified of those nocturnal things

We then looked at each other and both gave out a nervous laugh
as off came the fire surround.... to reveal a pile of black soot upon the hearth

Trev she says, you're resembling Dick Van Dyke... in that famous Mary Poppins film
as by the time I'd finished cleaning up the mess.....I'm covered in soot just like him

Doris is now getting the kettle on and warming up a Greggs cheese & onion bake
and
for afters too... we're having a nice piece of Victoria jam sponge - just to celebrate


In Britain all bat species and their roosts are legally protected by both domestic and international legislation. This means you may be committing a criminal offence if you deliberately take, injure or kill a wild bat. Intentionally or recklessly disturb a bat in its roost or deliberately disturb a group of bats

www.bats.org.uk

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billbaily
Super Member

1054 Posts

Posted - 28/01/2021 :  09:44:53 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote

RUN RUN RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN

Browsing on the Gwent Police website...came across a video...and couldn't just believe it
A business in Gwent had customers...sprinting for their lives...to the nearest fire exit

Not because of a threat of fire mind...but because they should never, ever have been in there
They'd been sneaking in behind closed doors...to catch up on their much needed? hair & beauty care

Boy were they running through those corridors... and in a flick of a mouse's tail was soon gone
Running faster than Mo Farah... when the police began to knock the front door of the salon

Check it for yourselves on the website... you'll see them scarpering very clearly on there
Some were in such a rush... they still had towels draped on their wet hair

Someone's £1000 less in their purse - Ouch!
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billbaily
Super Member

1054 Posts

Posted - 29/01/2021 :  15:16:12 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote

Trevor Remembers His 1950's Rock & Roll Winkle Pickers

Have you ever worn a pair of tight shoes.... that simply did not fit your feet
and you put them on with GRITTED TEETH because they looked real cool and neat

But many years later on you realised...it wasn't an ideal thing to do
Because you've now got flipping painful bunions...not just one but two!

Well there's no more wearing narrow, pinchy shoes... I'm leaving them on the shelf
It's a lesson I have learned the hard way.....I wish someone had told my younger self

They did look the part though when jiving to Bill Haley & The Comets


Apparently Teddy Boys were wearing clothes that were inspired by styles worn by dandies in the Edwardian period. The Daily Express coined the term Teddy Boy by shortening Edwardian to Teddy. Teddy Boys had their roots in music and dancing
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billbaily
Super Member

1054 Posts

Posted - 30/01/2021 :  11:06:45 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote


Albert & Myself thought we'd take up some physical exercise... so we attempted weight lifting many, many years ago
Didn't know what the heck I was thinking of... so gave up swiftly... as I was always aching and very sore

Not like our Georgie Muscles... who could lift a horse above his head... and... with his teeth pull a bus
He was a legend in Tredegar... everyone so excited to see his amazing feats of strength.. ..and that included us


I have to say Tredegar has produced some really talented/incredible people over the years... it makes me feel really proud of our little welsh town
as folk really have stepped up to the plate... and never let the side down

From weight lifters, snooker champs, politicians, doctors, nurses, teachers to name just a few
Miners, ironworkers, chartists, shop keepers including actors and singers too

we've all got something to contribute however big or small.. to our amazing 11,000 populated town
and it's time we started to look upwards.... because in recent months its been hard not to feel down

Well Doris and I are looking forward.... to getting our vaccines and we cannot wait for that momentous day to arrive
It will mean life will be able to get back to some normality.... and that includes seeing Wales... playing rugby again... LIVE

So we are waiting patiently for the postie....and what a hardy lot they are... out in shorts in all weathers... sunshine, wind, rain, snow and hail
They really have done an exceptional job in delivering... our lockdown parcels and hand written mail

Check out South Wales Argus 18th December 2017
George Davies - The Strong Man of Tredegar






Edited by - billbaily on 30/01/2021 11:09:30
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ShelleyW
Advanced Member

643 Posts

Posted - 30/01/2021 :  12:38:31 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
There was a repeat program on tele last week Fishlocks walking and on one of his walks in the Llanelli area he interviewed Georgie muscles he was such a character.......Also I think our little town of Tredegar is 15 thousand population 25 thousand when I was in school late 60s early 70s.( Where are they all gone) lol
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billbaily
Super Member

1054 Posts

Posted - 30/01/2021 :  13:50:44 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Thanks for the update Shelley I thought it may have been more than 11,000, I took the figure from the Tredegar Forum Homepage. I wonder if anyone knows a more up to date population figure of our town, maybe someone can look into it and put their findings on here. It would be interesting to find out.
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nutandboltdarlo
Full Member

United Kingdom
97 Posts

Posted - 30/01/2021 :  14:34:13 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by billbaily

Thanks for the update Shelley I thought it may have been more than 11,000, I took the figure from the Tredegar Forum Homepage. I wonder if anyone knows a more up to date population figure of our town, maybe someone can look into it and put their findings on here. It would be interesting to find out.



Wikipedia says the population was 15,103 in 2011, based on the collective total of the four electoral wards -
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tredegar

Years ago the AA members’ handbook gave details such as population, early closing days (remember those?), and hotels for almost every town in the country. I remember it gave Tredegar’s population as somewhere around 21,000 in the late 60s, similar to Shelley’s recollection.



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billbaily
Super Member

1054 Posts

Posted - 30/01/2021 :  17:07:30 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote

Gosh that is a significant decrease in population then. Perhaps the closure of collieries and steelworks made a big difference too
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billbaily
Super Member

1054 Posts

Posted - 31/01/2021 :  21:16:59 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
It's Your Round Bobin

Have you ever blurted out a Spoonerism....I have and my butty's laughed & laughed
I was in a rush to get my sentence out...and it came out completely daft

It is a verbal error... in which a speaker switches up the letters of two words
and when it comes flying out...it sounds hilariously funny and very much absurd

It was well known in an Oxford college that Reverend William Archibald was very prone for this mistake
and very often in his speeches a SPOONERISM he would make

We were in the NCB club years ago... enjoying a friendly afternoon chat
and someone mentioned an upcoming film and I butted in... I know that!

RATMAN & BOBIN

Well Albert and George fell about laughing... I really didn't think they were going to stop at all
I tell you now...to this very day...its a topic they really love to recall

In fact it's my nickname and boy do they take great pleasure in shouting it across a packed pub when I'm at the bar

Reverend William Archibald Spooner
1844-1930


Edited by - billbaily on 31/01/2021 21:30:49
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billbaily
Super Member

1054 Posts

Posted - 02/02/2021 :  10:02:18 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote

Oh I Do Like To Be Beside The Seaside

Key in the ignition... off we go... passing through the valley towns in our little Austin make car
Everyone's dressed in their summer clothes... and the destination Font-y-Gary - 42 miles isn't that far

How patient our dad was hearing "ARE WE THERE YET " X 100 TIMES

It's miners fortnight and the car is overloaded with spare car parts, suitcases and us kids holding on tightly to our plastic buckets & spades
It's holidays for everyone... 2 glorious weeks.. and a time for happy family memories to be made

Other times we'd travel to magical Barry Island....spend our pennies on the rides and in the brightly lit amusement arcades

Followed with delicious salt & vinegared fish & chips...wrapped in newspaper sheets and washed down with.... bubbles up your nose fizzy lemonade

I remember being mesmerised... by the coin operated, life size, laughing sailor that sat inside a very large glass case
and of eating sweet, sticky candyfloss on a stick and it clinging all over my hair and face

We'd browse along the many gift shops....giggling when passing by those funny, saucy postcards
and end the day with a leisurely evening stroll... watching the sunset from the beach promenade

Yes my brother and I have had some really lovely times on that warm, golden Barry Island sand
and what a thrill...on the journey home...watching those large aeroplanes at Rhoose airport coming into land

Just Perfect!

Check out past footage on the internet of the 'Bristol Queen' paddle steamer at Penarth pier taking passengers to and from South Wales - a wonderful sight

Miners fortnight - last week of July & 1st week of August



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billbaily
Super Member

1054 Posts

Posted - 05/02/2021 :  10:50:52 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote

A robin hopped upon my window sill... and appeared to be looking in
He knows that Trevor is the one that everyday .... puts food out for him

What a lovely bird he is with that gorgeous red flash across his chest
He really is an attractive bird... that is most welcome to be my garden guest

Mind you I've noticed he's quite bossy... and often chases the other birds away
The sparrows were quickly put in their place....I noticed this the other day

So I just make sure there's enough food in my garden for them all
that is enough seeds, nuts, fat balls for the birds.... big or small

Don't forget to look out and feed the many different species of our lovely feathered friends
Because wildlife is just as important to this world.. as me and you in the end

Robin Redbreast - Erithacus Rubecula
Eats
Worms, seeds, insects & other invertebrates
Length 14cms
Wing span 20-22 cms
Weight 14-21g

Young birds have no red breast and are spotted and golden brown
Aggressively territorial and are quick to drive away intruders

Robins sing all year round - you can hear a robin singing on RSPB.org.uk/birds
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billbaily
Super Member

1054 Posts

Posted - 05/02/2021 :  11:27:16 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote

Wipe Your Chops Trevor!

Has anyone got some handy tips...on how to eat a custard ice slice
Because I always end up with it on my chops and Doris says, Trev it doesn't look very nice

I've even approached it very carefully and gone in with a miniscule and dainty bite
But even that was a waste of time as custard came squelching and squirting out - not a pretty sight

Also when you hold the cake...the icing lid sticks to your fingers like very strong adhesive glue
You then end up eating the sweet icing on the top first ...something I didn't really want to do

What about spaghetti bolognese that's not too easy to pick up with your fork
Made even worse when your in new company and someone is waiting for you to talk

When you actually manage to get some in your mouth...the rest is hanging and absailing on your chin
Its one of those tasty meals you love...but you know it's a battle you cannot win

So Doris now breaks up the long italian spaghetti into very manageable small strips
Making me look a bit more presentable and it's easier to manoevre it to my lips

Yes some foods prove a little bit more tricky, I'd avoid them if you were on a first date
I'd advise you to be ordering something straight forward that would be served upon your plate

Read on the internet
There was a reference to bolognese, meat based recipe with pasta as far back as 1891 Pellegrino Artusi's cook book
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billbaily
Super Member

1054 Posts

Posted - 05/02/2021 :  19:16:05 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote

DIOLCH

Thank you all for reading my lockdown nonsense poems...I've decided that this will be my very last one
They've certainly kept me busy since last April...I've enjoyed doing them...it's been fun

So I'll raise my glass to all of you tonight...and wish you
All the best and good health for 2021

I'm putting my pen back in the pencil case...as my work here is finally done......

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nutandboltdarlo
Full Member

United Kingdom
97 Posts

Posted - 05/02/2021 :  22:27:19 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Thanks to you for keeping us entertained. I think you initially hoped that more of us would contribute, but I certainly couldn’t match your deft turn of phrase bringing your experiences to life. So I hope I speak for others in reciprocating your best wishes for a brighter, better 2021.
P.S. And you managed to fit in winning Strictly!
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billbaily
Super Member

1054 Posts

Posted - 06/02/2021 :  08:58:40 Link directly to this reply  Show Profile  Reply with Quote

Thanks for your kind comments, much appreciated. It's been interesting to have seen what new avenues lockdown has taken people to. If someone had said to me that I'd have been writing poetry all year I wouldn't have believed them.

So what I would like to say to all youngsters or even adults is you just never know what can be achieved until you try

No one moved forward by standing still
Try it... even if it is tiny steps at first

How true that is!
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